Are You a Bully?

July 28th, 2010

Sara's sleepover

I noticed something when my daughter was being bullied by one of her best friends. It was simply this: a lot of the parents I know were kinda bullying each other.

Think I’m crazy? It’s not that these parents were knocking into each other or making obvious attempts to make others feel left out, alone or insulted (although I know a few parents who behave that way, too! Jeesh!) No, these parents were all about talking about other families, kids or individuals in a really unkind manner. The thing that struck me, was that my daughter brought it to my attention.

“Why doesn’t Mrs. So-N-So like Mrs. So-N-So,” she asked me.

“Why don’t you think she likes her,” I asked.

“Because, she’s always talking about her,” said my daughter.

That’s when it hit me. Mrs. So-N-So was a bully! She had a way of talking about any person who walked away from a conversation that made everyone feel just a tad uncomfortable. We, the group of friends who share a friendship with the bully, just listen and put up with it. To me, it highlights how that person probably talks about me when I walk away from a conversation. Fine. I couldn’t care less. Talk away.

But what I hadn’t realized, and the part that startled me, was that my daughter, at age 12, noticed it and it bugged her. So by chatting with this woman; by being “friends” with this woman; I wondered, was I teaching my daughter that bullying was ok?

How do we, as adults, deal with bullies? Was I acting like a bully, too, then?

So I started to think about it. We are all modeling behavior as parents. Whether we are trying to or not, whatever we’re doing on a daily basis, we’re showing our kids an example. It’s a stresser, isn’t it?

I used that situation to talk to my daughter about how people are all different, and that the skills she learned to deal with her friend who was bullying her, are skills that will enhance her ability to have great friendships throughout her life.

She understood this point immediately.

“You have some really great friends, Mom,” she said.

And so this is how I could tell that my daughter was growing up. Her experience with bullying, in a way, helped her distinguish between those great friends that we all have and the other friends we socialize with. She could see the difference between my true friends vs. the variety of people that come in and out of our life, who we enjoy on an entirely different level.

But it made me think, too. Am I helping to encourage that bullying behavior by not addressing it as an adult? In a way, am I empowering bullying?

So, think about it. Do you do the same thing? Without meaning it, are you a bully?

That’s enough to send me on a 6-mile run! Off I go!

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

Isn’t She Beautiful?!?

May 17th, 2010

a true tween girl champion!
Photo Credit: http://iTwixie.com

This year has brought many incredible people into my life! This girl is a great example these kinds of people, and what they mean to me, my business and what the greater message should be to us all.

I met this girl at the Pittsburgh Kids Marathon One Mile Fun Run this year. iTwixie.com was a sponsor, so a team of us attended the event and offered all kids the chance to make friendship bracelets, compete for iTwixie t-shirts and Maddie Georgi cds (Maddie Georgi is the singer/songwriter of iTwixie’s theme song, “Go!”). After the kids finished the race, many stopped by to see what was going on at our booth.

This girl stopped by, hoola-hooped to win an iTwixie t-shirt, smiled for a few pictures and asked about iTwixie. I told her how iTwixie.com was the only site on the web that really is all about real tween girls like her, who are smart, savvy, athletic and curious about all kinds of stuff.

She and I had a great chat, because it turns out, she just started running last year and quickly learned that she was pretty fast. In fact, she kept running and now is one of the top ten fastest runners in her age group in the USA.

Pretty incredible, yes?

Isn’t she beautiful?

We’re celebrating our 1st birthday right now on iTwixie. We’ve met girls like this incredible runner all year long, who continue to amaze us with their incredible strength, positive attitude and real interest in reaching out to other girls like them. Companies around the globe are trying to teach these beautiful girls that they need make-up, sexy clothing and boys to know that they are beautiful.

At  iTwixie.com, we recognize the true beauty in each and every tween girl right now!  Whether she climbs trees, plays a sport, loves science, technology, engineering, math (STEM), literature, fashion, design, singing, acting, dressing up or dressing down, she is beautiful! Won’t you applaud your tween girl for being the real girl that she is today? Tell her she is smart, savvy, funny, cool, kooky, crazy, fun or courageous! And tell her all of those things make her beautiful!

Let’s stop pushing our girls away from embracing these incredible tween years! Let’s STOP encouraging them to wear make-up, pluck their eyebrows, wear skimpy clothing, worry about boys or what they look like! Let’s stop criticizing their “shape” at a time when their bodies are changing more rapidly than any other time in their lives! Let’s embrace them as the morphing beings they are! Won’t you simply embrace her as she is?

Let’s celebrate our tween girls and spark a revolution in this world to join us and cheer them on! Won’t you and your family join the iTwixie.com revolution?

One of the families that stopped by to talk to us at the Pittsburgh Kids Marathon One Mile Fun Run, shared their fun routine of running 1 mile, 3 times a week, together as a family. How fun! The kids were 5, 7 and 9. These kids, 2 girls and a little boy, looked at me, proud, steadfast as true champions, with medals hanging from their necks, a goody bag full of fun stuff, and an iTwixie t-shirt in their hands from winning one of the iTwixie challenges. Priceless, right? Better than taking them to a movie perhaps? Certainly better than hanging out at the mall all day or hitting a fast food joint, wouldn’t you agree?

It was a wonderful day!

The Pittsburgh Kids Marathon One Mile Fun Run is like many races throughout the world that bring families and kids together to celebrate family, fun and fitness. Won’t you find a race like it and run with your family soon? We’d love to hear about it!

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

You Can Run a 5K in 5 Weeks!

February 17th, 2010

The Human Race 5K.
Photo Credit: _e.t

It’s true!  YOU can train for a 5K and be ready in just 5 weeks — without being a runner!  It’s all about taking the time to train, and, making sure your doctor agrees it’s a good idea for you, of course.  Plan on training three days a week.  For this article, we’ll say M, W, F.  Ready?

Here’s how:

Week 1:

M, W, F - Find a 5K course and walk the entire distance.  It should take you about an hour.  Walk this course of 3 days this week.

Week 2:

M - Begin walking the same course for 30 minutes, jog for 10 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  You should be back to your starting point before an hour is up.

W - Walk the entire 5K minute course.  Are you hankering adding some jogging now?  If so, that is a good sign.

F - Begin walking the same course for 30 minutes, jog for 20 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  If you get back to your starting point before the 20 minutes is up, be sure to walk for about 5 minutes to cool down.

Week 3:

M - Begin walking the same course for 20 minutes, jog for 20 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  You should be back to your starting point before an hour is up.

W - Begin walking the same course for 20 minutes, jog for 20 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  Are you wishing to jog more now?  If so, you are rockin’!  If not, hang in there!

F - Begin walking the same course for 15 minutes, jog for 25 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  Always be sure to walk for about 5 minutes to cool down.

Week 4:

M - Begin walking the same course for 10 minutes, jog for 30 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  If you return to your starting point before the 30 minutes is up, be sure to walk 5 minutes to cool down.

W - Begin walking the same course for 10 minutes, jog for 30 minutes and walk the rest of the way back.  If you return to your starting point before the 30 minutes is up, be sure to walk 5 minutes to cool down.

F - Today’s a big day because today you will run the entire 5K course.  This will be the hardest day of your training.  But you are ready. Try to avoid walking - take your jog down to its slowest for a few seconds or walk if you need to but then try to resume your jog.  When you’re done, say to yourself, “I’ll never feel this tired again,” because it’s true!  Next time you run this course you will have stronger stamina and muscle tone.  You did it!

Was it easy?  Good for you!  Keep up the good work!  Don’t you feel amazing?

Week 5:

M - Jog the entire 5K.  Be sure to walk 5 minutes to cool down.  You should feel stronger than you did at the end of the run last week.

W - Jog the entire 5K.  Be sure to walk 5 minutes to cool down.

F - Jog for 10 minutes and then walk 10 minutes.  You are ready for your 5K race.  You are going to soar!  Good luck!

Let me know how this program works for you!

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

Happy Prairie Dog Day!

February 2nd, 2010

Prairie
Photo Credit: Umschauen

Have you had enough of the ground hog, too?  Then join the prairie dog craze!  Celebrate prairie dog day and help the world understand how important and special this little creature is… cheers!

Too Cute! Happy Prairie Dog Day! http://bit.ly/cBMKDD

Now, off to run 5 miles.  How many miles are you running today?

May your next run be a good one.  Rebecca


5 Things to Build Your & Your Tween’s Character

November 18th, 2009

IMG_4410
Photo Credit: iTwixie.com

Character: Character is a set of behavior traits that define what sort of person an individual is. It determines whether a person will effectively achieve goals, be forthright in dealing with others and will obey the laws and rules of the group. Although character is related to personality, it is not the same thing. Personality is primarily inborn traits, while character consists of learned behavior. Both may vary with the situation or circumstances.

Aren’t these girls fabulous? They are full of joy, happiness and are showing off their unique character. Sure they’re dressed up for Halloween — but they aren’t dressed in skimpy outfits, as divas or in the new wave of costume that tries to make our girls look like adults. They’re dressed up as football players! Very cool! Full of character!

To me, character is in crisis today. As a society we do not focus enough on helping to develop character in our budding leaders for tomorrow. This development has to begin early and continue through the pre-adolescent years, because by high school, much of this development must be in place to help our high schoolers make quality choices.

Instead of character development, it seems that our world is much more into complaining about stuff and focussing on appearances. In fact, as a society, we focus so much on appearances, that is it any wonder that our impressionable, young girls are finding themselves in crisis over how they look? Today we have a record number of a few, startling achievements: a record number of tween girls suffering from depression, eating disorders and contemplation of suicide.

Trouble is, there are numerous organizations out there who believe the problem is that our girls have low self esteem.

Maybe that is part of the problem. And, indeed, part of the solution.

But what if, maybe, the trouble starts with each adult today who has dropped the ball in aiding in the character development of our girls?

Regardless of whether or not you agree with me on that one, you will find this next thought challenging at the least and worth trying — TODAY — at the most!

Make TODAY the day that you DO something that empowers YOU and your daughter!

Start these TODAY:
- Stop gossiping at all, but especially in front of your daughter.
- Compliment your daughter on something she has done today, instead of how she looks.
- Do not mention one flaw of yours in front of your daughter.
- Start a meaningful project that your daughter can do as well, such as writing letters to the troops, collecting food for the hungry or designing a new way to collect paperboard for recycling in your home.
- Take 20 minutes and use them to make you and your daughter STRONGER: Lift some weights, or go for a walk or run, or take the Lunge Challenge on iTwixie.com with your daughter — this just might be the start to a whole new and stronger you and stronger daughter.

Well?

I’m no longer accepting comments on this blog, as I began to receive thousands everyday by some new friends representing a broad array of nonsense products. So, alas, until I install better filtering, please send your comments to my up and coming facebook page: A Running Mom!

May your next run be a good one.
Rebecca

Mommy & Daughter Time

November 8th, 2009

Mom & Daughter
Photo Credit: mendelza

Today I ran with my 3 daughters, my son and his friend, and our dog, Lulu.  We went to a nearby park where I love to run.  This was a special run for me for a bunch of reasons: 1. I am sore from my 6-mile run yesterday, so it was good to go for a light run 2. All three of my tween daughers ran with me, for at least a little while 3. It was a gorgeous day for getting outside and doing something physical together

As we were running back through this huge field, kicking a ball to keep us running and pushing each other to run faster, my eldest daughter and I couldn’t stop laughing, as we kept kicking the ball in front of each other and then raced to get to it first. I felt like I was 8 again, playing with my BFF, laughing while catching my breath and running with no form at all; just running to get to where I needed to go. It was bliss.

My son ran so fast he fell into a heap, trying to get to that ball.

It’s a priceless memory for me already, for the perfect mix of sun, fall, laughter and effort.

Do you run with your kids? What are your fave runs to enjoy together?

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

Tip 10 of 10 for a Better Running Routine: Challenge YourSELF!

October 20th, 2009

The Ghosts of the Chicago Marathon ... 2009 (284/365)
Photo Credit: Brian Gudas Photography

Tip 10: Challenge Yourself
Duh, right?
Wrong.

This is the most important, and yet illusive, tip of all! Just like this picture, our challenges are hidden; like ghosts; blurry; undefined. That’s because, depending where you are in your training, your recovery, your bad habits, your good habits, each of us face a very different challenge week to week. And yet, that one challenging thing can become the very thing that trips you up! You may have stopped challenging yourself!

Think about it! Consider me: I was training for the Chicago Marathon. I was in terrific shape — planning my runs, making them fun, getting up in the morning — and then BAM! My knee kept swelling and I couldn’t dedicate myself to physical therapy and I had to bail. Is this where I was tripped up? Well, no, not really, because I had to rest and come to terms with my injury.

Here’s the part that tripped me up: so I’m good to go now. Maybe I ought to take it easy for a while before I begin training for a big run again, but I am healthy to start running again. I have been for a while. Why haven’t I been running? Well, let me see, well, I did run one day. So I guess I was kinda running. Kind of. Sorta. You know, a run here and there and then, well, I was tired so I didn’t run one day and then… TRIP! Here’s where I was tripped up! I wasn’t challenging myself.

You may be doing the same thing right now, but it’s because you’ve accomplished a goal and so now you’re thinking, so what now? Right?

Take this last tip to heart. Challenge yourself. How do you do this?

Figure out the one thing that makes you a bit butterfly-in-the-tummy right now about running. Is it a specific run? The post-run ache? The need to cross-train? Are you putting off pilates, which could help you balance your muscle tone, and therefore are about to stop running, too? Are you just out of shape and get nervous about running a mile? 2 miles? Or are you comfortable at 4 miles and are simply bored out of your mind?

What is it for you? Once you figure that out, the answer will be easy. Do that one thing!

Me? It was my fave 5-mile run. Since I had stopped running and stopped my routine, I then got into that funny place where I knew that run would be a challenge for me. That psyched me out, because this is my fave run! My no-brainer run! And I felt a bit nervous about running it. See?

So, this weekend I took it on. I ran it. I enjoyed it. I felt a bit nervous at the beginning, and I had to push myself a bit. But I did it! Boy have I been sore this week! I even added a huge hill at the end to really crank up the soreness I’d feel. Ha-hah!

I feel incredible. I know I won’t be this sore next time I run. I challenged myself and now I’m off to plan a few more challenging runs to get me back into my routine. I’m back!

Won’t you join me?

I hope these tips have been helpful. I wish you fitness, fun and fabulous runs. Get out there and get running! On your terms! On your behalf! And know I’m cheering you on! Will you cheer for me?

May your next run be a great one.

Rebecca

Tip 9 of 10 For A Better Running Routine: Take A Break

October 8th, 2009

Hannah and Lauren run 5K
Photo Credit: MrsHoppy

Tip 9: Take A Break

Don’t these girls inspire you?

So I’ve been incredibly quiet as I deal with the reality that I cannot complete a goal I set for myself. My training has been interrupted as I deal with a knee thing and a time contraint thing. But as a dear friend once said to me, sometimes you just need to take a break. The running will wait.

I’m tired of waiting! And yet, as I strengthen the muscles around my knee, I do realize that sometimes you just need a break, it’s true. And maybe I’ll be able to turn my running around and get ‘em for the next one!

In the meantime, since there’s no pain or swelling for miles under 6, I ran a local race 5K and took 2nd in my age group! LOL. It was a fun run. Such a fun run! I finished with a tween girl who ran a terrific race. She is 9. Me? Well, I’m not 9. Or 29. Or 39. But I’m not 49! LOL. But it reminded me of how running races brings joy to all, doesn’t it? You’re outside, with a group of like-minded people, doing something that brings us together in a common bond. Some are nervous. Some are excited. But all are filled with a level of anticipation and then a great sense of accomplishment when the race is over and everyone has done something good.

I enjoyed that finish immensely, not because of a fast time and not because of a great race, but because I helped this little girl finish strong in a race she had no idea that she would win for her age group. Cheers to Elizabeth!

As for me? Well, it builds character to deal with disappointment. It strengthens our spirit to perservere. It give us joy to help out others. These are the things I hope to value in a few weeks after continued rest, a new pair of shoes, and a renewed focus on my running plan.

Hm… there’s a bit of Tip 10 in that one, isn’t there! There’s certainly a great theme to bring to iTwixie.com girls, too! Sometimes we all just need to take a break. Strengthen up. And begin again. It may even make us stronger.

How do you deal with having to to bail on things you value?

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

Tip 8 of 10 For A Better Running Routine: Do It For A Reason!

August 28th, 2009

Paddlers for Peace: Let it Run
Photo Credit: KitAy

Tip 8: Do It For A Reason!

Ok. I’ve been on vacation, traveling and I took a break from my blog.  But surely time has brought more discipline and focus to our running, right?  We are running more regularly, with more passion, regularity and intensity.  Yes? No?

Ok. Still, we need motivation.  Here’s where Tip 8 comes in.

Tip 8:  Stop running just for you.

Choose a purpose for your running. Choose a cause; an organization; a benefactor; a friend. Choose something or someone who could benefit from your running and commit to them; him; her.

The people in this picture are paddling for peace.

Powerful, yes?

If the caption read: a group of fun-loving friends enjoying padding along the river. This would not have carried as much clout, right? This is the point of Tip 8.

We had our first child in June 1997. We had lost our first friend that year, too. I needed motivation to carry on and care for myself and do a simple thing called running. So, a friend and I decided to sign up for the Paris Marathon. We ran it for our friend. I ran it for him and me. Committing to that run made me commit to more than just training. It made me focus on doing something bigger than something just for me. At the end of that race I felt like a special person. I had endured tough circumstances as a nursing mom to get those miles in — no need for details here — it was challenging! So crossing that finish line meant so much on so many levels. I loved it. It became a lifelong memory.

Crazy? Maybe.

Worth it? Definately.

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca

Tip 7 of 10 For A Better Running Routine: Make It Pretty!

August 13th, 2009

NewYork200710b 085
Photo Credit: Ecnerwal

Tip 7: Make It Pretty!

Sound too fluffy? It’s true! Plan at least one a week that is pretty. You know, one that offers eye candy. Great inspiration. Views. Perhaps a place of sentimental value. You know why? Then the run all of a sudden becomes WORTH IT! You must plan, make extra time, consider options, perhaps discuss ideas about where you will run. Not every day. Just once a week. And shazam! You’ll find yourself hankering that run. Wishing it was Saturday so you could go on that run. You may even plan a run that’s just a little challenging… a-ha!  And then you’ll have to make sure that you’re ready for the upcoming run. So you’ll plan a couple of more challenging runs in preparation of the “pretty” one. I’m telling you, it’s powerful stuff.

One of my fave all-time runs is the Brooklyn Bridge. Just experiencing that fabulous moment of crossing over the Brooklyn Bridge and all of a sudden you can’t see the whole city any longer so it kind of feels like the city swallows you whole is absolutely envigorating. I just love it.

I recently had the chance to run the Brooklyn Bridge 3 times in a row. What a feeling! I’m ready to run the NYC Marathon again after all that fabulousness! LOL. But really, it was a great inspirational moment and it made me realize that those pretty, “eye candy” runs can tip the scale for getting me committed to a better running routine. Let it tip your scale, too.

May your next run be a good one.

Rebecca