Are You a Bully?
I noticed something when my daughter was being bullied by one of her best friends. It was simply this: a lot of the parents I know were kinda bullying each other.
Think I’m crazy? It’s not that these parents were knocking into each other or making obvious attempts to make others feel left out, alone or insulted (although I know a few parents who behave that way, too! Jeesh!) No, these parents were all about talking about other families, kids or individuals in a really unkind manner. The thing that struck me, was that my daughter brought it to my attention.
“Why doesn’t Mrs. So-N-So like Mrs. So-N-So,” she asked me.
“Why don’t you think she likes her,” I asked.
“Because, she’s always talking about her,” said my daughter.
That’s when it hit me. Mrs. So-N-So was a bully! She had a way of talking about any person who walked away from a conversation that made everyone feel just a tad uncomfortable. We, the group of friends who share a friendship with the bully, just listen and put up with it. To me, it highlights how that person probably talks about me when I walk away from a conversation. Fine. I couldn’t care less. Talk away.
But what I hadn’t realized, and the part that startled me, was that my daughter, at age 12, noticed it and it bugged her. So by chatting with this woman; by being “friends” with this woman; I wondered, was I teaching my daughter that bullying was ok?
How do we, as adults, deal with bullies? Was I acting like a bully, too, then?
So I started to think about it. We are all modeling behavior as parents. Whether we are trying to or not, whatever we’re doing on a daily basis, we’re showing our kids an example. It’s a stresser, isn’t it?
I used that situation to talk to my daughter about how people are all different, and that the skills she learned to deal with her friend who was bullying her, are skills that will enhance her ability to have great friendships throughout her life.
She understood this point immediately.
“You have some really great friends, Mom,” she said.
And so this is how I could tell that my daughter was growing up. Her experience with bullying, in a way, helped her distinguish between those great friends that we all have and the other friends we socialize with. She could see the difference between my true friends vs. the variety of people that come in and out of our life, who we enjoy on an entirely different level.
But it made me think, too. Am I helping to encourage that bullying behavior by not addressing it as an adult? In a way, am I empowering bullying?
So, think about it. Do you do the same thing? Without meaning it, are you a bully?
That’s enough to send me on a 6-mile run! Off I go!
May your next run be a good one.
Rebecca
July 6th, 2011 at 10:39 pm
buy@viagra.online” rel=”nofollow”>……
Need cheap generic VIAGRA?…
July 24th, 2011 at 6:12 pm
buy@generic.LEVITRA” rel=”nofollow”>……
Need cheap generic LEVITRA?…
July 29th, 2011 at 6:57 am
Order@Cheap.Abana” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buynow it…
July 29th, 2011 at 11:12 am
Buy@Abilify.Online” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buygeneric meds…
July 29th, 2011 at 11:47 am
Buy@Cheap.Abilify” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buynow it…
July 29th, 2011 at 9:51 pm
Purchase@Generic.Abilify.5mg.10mg.15mg.20mg.30mg” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buynow it…
July 31st, 2011 at 1:47 am
Order@Generic.Acai” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buywithout prescription…
August 3rd, 2011 at 2:10 am
Purchase@Cheap.Abilify” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buywithout prescription…
August 3rd, 2011 at 3:39 am
Get@Abilify.Online” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buyit now…
August 3rd, 2011 at 3:57 pm
Buy@Cheap.Acai” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buywithout prescription…
August 3rd, 2011 at 7:20 pm
Order@Acai.Online” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buyit now…
August 4th, 2011 at 2:12 am
Purchase@Discount.Acai” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buygeneric drugs…
August 4th, 2011 at 4:57 am
Cheap@Acai.Online” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buynow…
August 5th, 2011 at 9:00 am
Purchase@Discount.Energy.Boost” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buynow it…
August 5th, 2011 at 1:30 pm
Buy@Cheap.Accupril” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric meds…
August 5th, 2011 at 6:57 pm
Purchase@Accupril.Online” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric drugs…
August 7th, 2011 at 5:49 am
Buy@Cheap.Aciphex” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric meds…
August 10th, 2011 at 5:34 pm
Cheap@Actonel.Without.Prescription” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buynow it mou…
August 10th, 2011 at 10:25 pm
Buy@Cheap.Actoplus.Met” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buygeneric meds qmo…
August 12th, 2011 at 1:52 pm
Order@Cheap.Adalat” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buygeneric drugs lzt…
August 13th, 2011 at 2:21 pm
Buy@Generic.Abilify.Without.Prescription” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buynow it tly…
August 14th, 2011 at 12:53 pm
Buy@Generic.Acai” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric drugs mby…
August 14th, 2011 at 8:27 pm
Cheap@Generic.Acai” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buydrugs without prescription vrg…
August 15th, 2011 at 12:17 pm
Order@Cheap.Energy.Boost” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buyno prescription wkp…
August 15th, 2011 at 1:15 pm
Order@Discount.Energy.Boost” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buyno prescription gdt…
August 18th, 2011 at 5:15 am
Order@Cheap.Aciphex” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buydrugs without prescription faj…
August 18th, 2011 at 10:10 am
Purchase@Discount.Aciphex” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buyno prescription jui…
August 21st, 2011 at 7:01 am
Buy@Actonel.Online” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buydrugs without prescription hak…
August 21st, 2011 at 3:15 pm
Order@Cheap.Actonel” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric drugs nih…
August 21st, 2011 at 5:56 pm
Purchase@Actonel.Online” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buygeneric drugs vbr…
August 21st, 2011 at 7:16 pm
Purchase@Cheap.Actonel” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buydrugs without prescription xab…
August 23rd, 2011 at 2:09 am
Order@Discount.Advair” rel=”nofollow”>..…
Buyno prescription tao…
August 25th, 2011 at 5:34 am
Get@Aggrenox.Online” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buynow fjl…
August 25th, 2011 at 12:13 pm
Order@Cheap.Albenza” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buynow it sxk…
August 28th, 2011 at 2:36 am
risperdal@vs.abilify” rel=”nofollow”>.…
Buygeneric drugs…
August 28th, 2011 at 6:16 pm
allegra@generic.purchase” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buynow…
September 16th, 2011 at 2:22 pm
……
Search music now US Charts…
October 17th, 2011 at 2:40 am
sleep aids and half-life…
Buy_it now…
October 18th, 2011 at 8:17 am
adhd drugs causing hallucinations…
Buy_generic meds…
October 20th, 2011 at 8:18 am
number of obese in this generation…
Buy_generic meds…
October 20th, 2011 at 9:57 am
aspirin pain relief dog…
Buy_drugs without prescription…
October 21st, 2011 at 4:49 am
drug alcohol prevention resilience…
Buy_it now…
October 25th, 2011 at 6:49 pm
research being done to treat hiv…
Buy_generic pills…
October 26th, 2011 at 11:09 pm
serotonin natural sources…
Buy_generic meds…
October 27th, 2011 at 8:48 pm
nursing drug study website…
Buy_drugs without prescription…
October 28th, 2011 at 1:28 pm
planar warts…
Buy_drugs without prescription…
November 1st, 2011 at 7:26 am
stop smoking phlegm…
Buy_drugs without prescription…
November 3rd, 2011 at 1:32 pm
what foods anorexia eat…
Buy_drugs without prescription…
November 5th, 2011 at 11:12 pm
nexium pepsin ac…
Buy_generic drugs…
November 7th, 2011 at 10:13 am
will the recession become a depression…
Buy_without prescription…
November 7th, 2011 at 3:11 pm
teen girl 16 18.6 bmi…
Buy_generic drugs…
November 8th, 2011 at 10:01 am
acne scar and pit lamp…
Buy_generic drugs…
November 9th, 2011 at 11:26 am
synephrine hcl diet pills…
Buy_generic pills…
November 10th, 2011 at 10:25 pm
terry abbot…
Buy_generic drugs…
November 13th, 2011 at 8:45 am
benicar hct and norvasc…
Buy_it now…
November 13th, 2011 at 3:25 pm
macon georgia drug court…
Buy_without prescription…
December 9th, 2011 at 1:28 pm
canadian@pharmacy.valtrex” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buygeneric meds…
December 10th, 2011 at 5:40 pm
indications@for.use.of.atrovent” rel=”nofollow”>……
Buygeneric meds…